Meet your new hydration sidekick: the “Mood Swings Are My Cardio” Water Bottle by The Menopause Mafia. Designed for women 35–65 who break a sweat over everything except the gym, this bottle is your ultimate midlife companion.

Made from durable, lead- and BPA-free stainless steel, it keeps drinks cold while you keep your cool (most days). Available in 25 oz and 40 oz sizes, it’s perfect for hot flashes, chaos, and chasing caffeine like it’s cardio. Comes with a secure plastic lid or straw lid depending on size, because spillage is for amateurs — not Mafia members.

This bottle says what every woman’s thinking: midlife is sweaty, chaotic, and hilarious. It’s a must-have for perimenopause, menopause, or post menopause — and it makes the perfect gift for anyone whose mood swings should come with a hydration plan.

Features & Benefits:

✅ Stainless steel construction: durable + toxin-free
✅ Two size options: 25 oz or 40 oz
✅ Plastic lid or straw lid (depending on size)
✅ BPA & lead-free, eco-conscious design
✅ Bold slogan, double-sided: “Mood Swings Are My Cardio”
✅ Funny + functional gift for women 35–65
✅ Geo appeal: designed in the USA, shipped nationwide
✅ Care: hand wash only (because dishwasher patience is gone)